The Chemist´s

Después de examinarlo el doctor le dio una receta. Del clásico de Jerome K. Jerome, Three Men in a Boat…

"…I did not open it.  I took it to the nearest chemist’s, and handed it in.  The man read it, and then handed it back.

He said he didn’t keep it.

I said:

“You are a chemist?”

He said:

“I am a chemist.  If I was a co-operative stores and family hotel combined, I might be able to oblige you.  Being only a chemist hampers me.”

I read the prescription.  It ran:

“1 lb. beefsteak, with

1 pt. bitter beer every 6 hours.

1 ten-mile walk every morning.

1 bed at 11 sharp every night.

And don’t stuff up your head with things you don’t understand.”

I followed the directions, with the happy result—speaking for myself—that my life was preserved, and is still going on.

In the present instance, going back to the liver-pill circular, I had the symptoms, beyond all mistake, the chief among them being “a general disinclination to work of any kind.”

What I suffer in that way no tongue can tell.  From my earliest infancy I have been a martyr to it.  As a boy, the disease hardly ever left me for a day.  They did not know, then, that it was my liver.  Medical science was in a far less advanced state than now, and they used to put it down to laziness.

“Why, you skulking little devil, you,” they would say, “get up and do something for your living, can’t you?”—not knowing, of course, that I was ill.

And they didn’t give me pills; they gave me clumps on the side of the head.  And, strange as it may appear, those clumps on the head often cured me—for the time being.  I have known one clump on the head have more effect upon my liver, and make me feel more anxious to go straight away then and there, and do what was wanted to be done, without further loss of time, than a whole box of pills does now.

You know, it often is so—those simple, old-fashioned remedies are sometimes more efficacious than all the dispensary stuff." … (Adaptado del clásico de Jerome K. Jerome, Three Men in a Boat)

Vocabulario:

Co-operative store: una tienda operada y controlada por un grupo en el que tienen una acción.

Oblige: satisfacerlo

Hamper: obstaculiza

Clump: golpe

El libro

Una de las cosas que más se alaba sobre Three Men in a Boat es como todo parece no tener época al ojo del lector moderno. Las bromas parecen actuales e inteligentes aún hoy en día.

Estamos terminando de leer Around the World in Eighty Days, de Julio Verne